'Find your level of acceptable risk.'

Skate Park School

Lesson 01 : ‘Find your level of acceptable risk’

This is where a 2-year old and a 4-year old spend a chunk of time, frequently dragging along their father.

It is where a great deal of education takes place upon the concrete forms and the metal railings and the chain link fences surrounding. It is also the launching point where forays to other such environs as public libraries and deep mysterious forests are strategized and dreamed into reality.

I have been bringing children to skate parks for a number of years, and there are two important things to know:

1. My skating skills are somewhat equivalent to the singing skills of William Shatner. That is to say, your first impression might be to laugh. But at second impression, you might also be entertained and find a begrudging respect.*

2. The skate park is certainly a literal and concrete (literally) place. But it also represents some ideas and concepts that are important that are about more than just a skate park. I thought this year I would outline some lessons I’ve learned from hanging out with kids in these concrete hangouts.

3. *Note : this is honestly an unfair analogy to Bill Shatner. Fact is, I’m a lousy skater.

The four-year old hurled himself down the ramps with abandon, laughing raucously underneath his mohawk helmet as he precariously powered his balance bike down and over various concrete forms.

I thought about the acceptance of danger, risk, and the importance of living a life in which you push yourself outside your comfort zone…with a helmet or appropriate protection for the occasion. Sort of like wearing a mask during a pandemic. It’s not gonna (necessarily) save your life every time you wear it. But it’s gonna help. Even when it’s uncomfortable and you don’t feel like wearing it.

So his helmet danced up his forehead, revealing the careless attention of a parent who had not carefully adjusted the straps. Sort of like wearing a mask during a pandemic with your nose uncovered. Yeah, it’s gonna help a little bit. But not as much as it could or should.

So someone, perhaps a 44-year old, was reminded of the importance of bringing the right size helmet and making sure it fits appropriately.

At some point, every time, the bike riding gets old and he hops off to pursue more extreme acts of daredevilry, such as chasing his younger brother up the ramps, or problem-solving ways to help get the same little fella outta the bowl and thus escape the clutches of their tyrannical dad (me).

Watching a 2-year old careen around a series of concrete ramps, bowls, ledges, drop offs, and stairs is terrifying. It’s terrifying.

But bringing a child into this world and raising kids is terrifying.

I think one of the great things we can do for our kids is to help them learn to actively embrace risk. A type of risk that shows how to take appropriate precautions and to understand the difference between little consequences and big consequences.

In other words:

1. Appropriate precautions by wearing helmets while operating a wheeled vehicle on concrete.

2. Little consequences = running on flat concrete and tripping, thereby ending up a skinned knee, elbow, or some such injury.

3. Big consequences = running headlong toward a deep bowl and tripping, thereby facing the prospect of a concussion, broken bones, and/or major cuts, scrapes, or injuries.

It’s easy to think that kids just learn these things; that they just somehow figure them out at some point. In many ways that’s true. But every kid is different, and every kid has got to figure out for themselves how to internally find and develop the courage to take risk, the bravery to step outside of their comfort zone with anything new, the trust to listen and obey their parent or guardian in risk-filled circumstances, and the wisdom to begin discerning between the consequences of various types of risk.

Other things learned / skills acquired / topics discussed:

• Prayer in school. In other words, two boys remembering on their own to say grace before their mid-morning trail mix snack.

• Geography: Washington, Oregon, Hawaii, Arizona, New York, Alaska, syllables

• A four-year old teaching his two-year old brother about the difference between grasshoppers and crickets. The information conveyed, was a mix of fact, mysticism, and magical realism.

• Cheerleading teenage skaters on by waving, air high-fives, and general expressions of friendly support.

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